Mixtape
by tjmack
Summary: Sawyer and Claire are best friends but he's always loved her in silence. When she starts dating Charlie, Sawyer's jealousy peaks and he finally admits his feelings to her. Will his admission ruin what they have or give him all he's ever wanted?


Mixtape

Summary: Sawyer and Claire are best friends but he's always loved her in silence. When she starts dating Charlie, Sawyer's jealousy peaks and he finally admits his feelings to her. Will his admission ruin what they have or give him all he's ever wanted?

* * *

**Sawyer's POV**

Jumping up from my sleeping position I wipe at the sweat that has formed on my forehead. From my tent's position, I can see Claire's tent perfectly. Her boyfriend Charlie Pace is sitting beside her, little Aaron cradled tightly in his arms. Hoping for bad things to happen to the scrawny Brit, I stand up to stretch.

I haven't always been quite like this. I haven't been so filled of---jealous rage. Claire Littleton is the only girl to ever make me feel like I might be capable of actually harming another human being. I'm usually a very laid back, very easy-going guy. That is until Claire finds some other douche to date, then all I can feel is this insane jealously that takes over my entire body. All I've ever wanted, is to tell Claire how much I love her. How much I want to be with her. I've known Claire for a while now, and I have yet to actually grow a pair and actually say the words that could make or break our relationship. On one hand, I might get the one thing I've wanted for the longest time. On the other hand—I might lose her altogether. This is what keeps me from telling her, because I've decided that I'd rather have her as just a friend, then not have her in my life at all.

"Sawyer." I hear her call my name. I can't fight the smile that crosses my face, and I hope that I don't look quite like the idiot I feel that I am.

"Hey Claire, how's it going?" I asked, mentally kicking myself for asking such a stupid question.

"Oh, you know—the usual. About to go grab breakfast with Kate. You sure you don't wanna come with—she is single--"

I can hear the rest of her sentence even without her finishing it. She's been trying to get me to date Kate for close to a year. I keep making excuses, but I'm starting to run out of them. I fear I might have to just go on one date with Kate, just to appease Claire.

"Nah. I think I might take in a book."

"You always say no. Do you not like our company?"

I have to bit my lip to keep the words from flying from my mouth. This buys me sometime to think. I avoid looking at her, afraid the love I feel for her is written in my eyes.

"Claire—you know how much you and Kate just love to gossip. Do I look like a gossip to you?"

"Good point. Wouldn't want to bore you."

I know she's joking but her words sting just a bit. I'd give anything to spend the day with her, like we used to. Of course this was before Charlie came into the picture. Claire is a very—passionate person. When she's in a relationship, she has to spend as much time and energy on it as humanly possible. Plus guys don't generally like to let their girls hang around with other guys, even if said guy had been her best friend long before he came along.

"I'll see you later Sawyer. You should come over to the tent later—hang out with me and Charlie. I miss you buddy."

I feel my heart pound into my ears, and it takes everything in me to not jump up from my seat and press my lips to hers like I do every night in my dreams.

"I'll try. Later Claire."

My words are a mere whisper, as she waves goodbye and disappears.

* * *

I find Kate and Claire at their usual spot, and watch them from a distance. Thankfully where I'm standing I can hear what they're saying. Hoping to hear that her relationship with the munchkin isn't doing well.

"Oh my god Kate. Charlie is so amazing. He's such a good guy, totally different from everyone else that I date. He's so good with Aaron. I think that maybe—he might be the one."

"Come on Claire. You've only been dating him for a month or so."

"I know, but Kate—he's absolutely amazing."

I can feel my hands shaking. This is not what I expected, and I can feel the anger bubbling up to the very top of my head. I watch as Claire smiles softly at Kate before walking off toward the ocean. I stalk off after her. Catching up to her quickly, I grab her wrist and turn her around to face me.

"Geez Sawyer, give me a heart attack why don't you."

She smiles at me, and just stare at her. I can't fight it anymore. I need her to know how I feel before she goes and makes some big decision like marrying the munchkin.

"I love you."

"What are you trying to say?"

The look of utter confusion on her face, any other time, would make me bust out laughing. This, however, is no laughing matter. I stare more intently at her, and I slow down.

"I love you."

"You can't—we can't—just—go!"

I try to hide the painful look I know is written all over my face, as I slowly turn and walk away. My worst fear has come to face—and I feel as if my life might just be over.

* * *

**Claire's POV**

I try to hide the tears in my eyes, as I avoid Sawyer's eyes. Why did he have to wait until now to tell me this!? Why did he wait till I started to fall in love with someone else? I could have loved him so much, if only he had told me sooner. If I had known he wouldn't have rejected the idea of him and me together—I would have said something sooner. I didn't mean to be quite so mean and defensive with him, but his admission shocked the hell right out of me. I want to call him back, I want to tell him that I love him too. I want to, but I can't. Not only because of Charlie, and the overwhelming feelings I have for him, but because of Aaron. He's grown quite attached to Charlie. I couldn't take Charlie away from him like that, not for my own selfish reasons.

"Hey babe." Charlie's husky voice is in my ear, and his arms are wound around my waist. I instantly feel better, and I let myself relax against his chest.

"Hi Charlie." My voice is a soft whisper, afraid if I speak too loudly the tears will actually fall. That is something I don't need to explain to Charlie.

"Aaron misses his mum. Why don't you come back to the tent?" I couldn't resist him when his voice went all deep and husky like that. I let him take my hand and lead me back to our shared tent.

Once inside I pick up my little boy and cradle him in my arms. Without even a thought I turn toward Sawyer's tent, and see him flinging most of his possessions into an over the shoulder bag.

"Where is Sawyer going?" My voice is a low whisper.

"I think I heard him talking—or rather yelling at Jack about something. Needing time alone. I don't really know—why?"

"Oh—uh no reason."

At the sound of my voice, his head lifts and he looks at me. If I didn't have teary eyes myself, I'd swear he was—or had been crying. Quickly, he turns his head, flings the bag on his shoulder, and stalks off into the forest.

* * *

**Two Days Later**

It's been two days since Sawyer departed from our small campground, and I still feel like a large part of myself has been ripped away. I keep peering into the forest, hoping to see him trudging back. I need to know that he is safe, that he hasn't hurt himself out there all by himself.

"Hey Claire—what's wrong?"

I knew it wouldn't be long that Charlie would pick up my passive behavior. I haven't even kissed him once since Sawyer left—hell since Sawyer admitted his feelings to me.

"I'm so sorry—I can't do this Charlie."

He looks at me, almost knowingly, and nods a goodbye. Grabs his stuff and walks out of my life, possibly for good. I close my eyes tightly, to try and stop the tears, when I hear a loud commotion. I look toward a large group of people that has formed, and see the one face that I've wanted to see for two days now. I snatch up Aaron quickly, and nearly run toward Sawyer. He looks at me for a moment, before adverting his eyes, and walking away from me. Looking for Kate, I find her and walk toward her.

"Can you watch him for a moment?" I ask.

She looks at me, questions in her eyes, but she shrugs before taking Aaron from my arms. I mouth a thank you to her, before dashing off after Sawyer. I find him by our favorite tree.

"I'm so sorry for everything I said."

"What are you saying?"

"I realize now, that we're meant to be together."

"That is what I've wanted to hear."

He smiled at me, before pulling me into his chest. As he pulled back from the hug, he bent down, his lips brushing softly against mine, before the kiss escalated. In that instant I realized that my words were true, and that Sawyer is the one for me.


End file.
